Life From A-Z in the Word Part 12 of 22
Psalm 119:89-96

Tonight we are going to continue with our study from the 119th Psalm.  In this twelfth section, David tells us “What You Need To Know About The Bible” in verses 89-96.

Some kids were asked questions about the Old and New Testaments and gave the following statements.

In the first book of the bible called Geniuses, God got tired of creating the world, so he took the Sabbath off.

Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree.  Noah's wife was called Joan of Ark.  Noah built an ark, which the animals come on to in pears.

Lot's wife was a pillar of salt by day, but a ball of fire by night.

Samson was a strongman who let himself be led astray by a Jezebel like Delilah.

Samson slayed the Philistines with the axe of the Apostles.

Moses led the hebrews to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bread which is bread without any ingredients.

The Egyptians were all drowned in the dessert. Afterwards, Moses went up on Mount Cyanide to get the ten ammendments.

The first commandment was when Eve told adam to eat the apple.

The seventh commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery.

Moses died before he ever reached Canada. Then Joshua led the hebrews in the battle of Geritol.

The greatest miracle in the Bible is when Joshua told his son to stand still and he obeyed him.

David was a hebrew king skilled at playing the liar. he fought with the Finklesteins, a race of people who lived in Biblical times.

Solomon, one of David's sons, had 300 wives and 700 porcupines.

When Mary heard that she was the mother of Jesus, she sang the Magna Carta.

When the three wise guys from the east side arrived, they found Jesus in the manager.

Jesus was born because Mary had an immaculate contraption.

St. John the blacksmith dumped water on Jesus’s head.

Jesus enunciated the Golden Rule, which says to do one to others before they do one to you.  He also explained, "a man doth not live by sweat alone."

It was a miracle when Jesus rose from the dead and managed to get the tombstone off the entrance.

The people who followed the lord were called the 12 decibels.

One of the apostles was St. Matthew who was also a taximan.

Ninety-three percent of Americans own a copy of the Bible or other Scriptures, yet only 42% can name just five of the Ten Commandments. - Milwaukee Journal Sentinel

What do you know about the Bible?

An unknown writer once described the Bible this way.  He said, "This Book is the mind of God, the state of man, the way of salvation, the doom of sinners, and the happiness of believers.  Its doctrines are holy, its precepts are binding; its histories are true, and its decisions are immutable.  Read it to be wise, believe it to be safe, practice it to be holy.  It contains light to direct you, food to support you, and comfort to cheer you.  It is the traveler's map, the pilgrim's staff, the pilot's compass, the soldier's sword, and the Christian's character.  Here paradise is restored, heaven opened, and the gates of hell disclosed. Christ is its grand subject, our good its design, and the glory of God its end.  It should fill the memory, rule the heart, and guide the feet.  Read it slowly, frequently, prayerfully.  It is a mine of wealth, a paradise of glory, and a river of pleasure. Follow its precepts and it will lead you to Calvary, to the empty tomb, to a resurrected life in Christ; yes, to glory itself, for eternity."

If you were to try to describe the Bible in your own words as this write so ably did, what would you say about it.  What would you say is the most important characteristics for your own personal life?

David describes for us 3 characteristics of the Bible that are not only important to him but to all of us today.  What are they?